Writing can be so relieving. Architect Gurudev Singh once told me- ‘The mind is always bubbling with ideas, and only once that the idea has been penned down will it be able to get over the excitement, and move on to the next.’ So true. Also, unasked-(i wonder if the word exists)- questions in the mind cause endless debates within- with no actual baseline. Sometimes you cannot see beyond what your mind is occupied with. Write it down. Then, you will see. I think the single most powerful sentence I wrote that helped relieve me was this- “What is today? Is it what it has become, or is it what we want it to be?”. This question had been lying in my mind- scattered, vague, without voice and unclear-(also unanswered)- until I finally wrote about the confusion in my mind. I wrote and wrote- about why I keep talking about revival and technology. About why I cannot design in deconstruction. About why I keep romanticizing the past. About what it is that I am struggling with. About what I think of globalization. About why I am a rigid designer. Then, suddenly, I typed it- it was brilliant- I could finally give it the words. Now I know the exact root of my concern- and it has helped me understand my own thoughts better.

I think I am a very difficult person to live with. I am extremely moody, highly emotional and very instinctive. I give my mom a very hard time.

Some really big questions of my life are looming over my head. It’s crunch-time. I cannot believe its time already- it’s time. I feel like I am fooling around still; kilometers away from the step. I don’t want to reach; I don’t want to take it up. It’s close now...maybe I should just jump, give in..

I like it when people use uncommon adjectives. It makes speech so interesting. In the movie Notting Hill, Hugh Grant uses the phrase- ‘spectacularly unfair’. Hehe..I loved that.